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Christmas Ape DRY PANTIES Cami

The firing of our own Michael Tunison from his position at the Washington Post should inspire you to get "totally fucking wasted" in this limited-availability cami. Choose your color. Large, friendly parrot not included.

$ 16.50

CHRISTMAS APE Home LADIES Tee

The firing of our own Michael Tunison from his position at the Washington Post should inspire you to get "totally fucking wasted" in this limited-availability tee. KSK logo on back. Choose your color. Large, friendly parrot not included.

$ 24.50

CHRISTMAS APE Home MENS Tee

$ 24.50

CHAMPS Defense New York Tee

$ 18.00

CHAMPS Offense New York Tee

$ 18.00

LAIDES SLASHIE /wants to kiss Tee

Text right between the nipples. Choose your color.

$ 20.00

SLASHIE /wants to kiss Heavy Tee

Choose your color.

$ 20.00

KSK GLENDALE LOGO Tee

The first-ever KSK logo Tee. 'Nuff said.

$ 25.00

LADIES DOOR FLIES OPEN Dallas Home Tee

The adornment your rogue breasts have been missing all these years.

$ 18.00

Mens ELI Home Blue Tee

Celebrate the emergence of hope with this spoof of the classic NY logo. Great to wear during those hard-fought squash matches!

$ 18.00

SLASHIE /shits pants Onesie

Choose your color.

$ 15.00

SLASHIE /shits pants Tee

Choose your color.

$ 15.00

SLASHIE /high Heavy Tee

Choose your color.

$ 20.00

Mens ELI Road White Ringer Tee

Celebrate the emergence of hope with this spoof of the classic NY logo. Great to wear during those hard-fought squash matches!

$ 20.00

MARMALARD HOME BLUE TEE

Christmas Ape's Marmalard comes to life with this awesome Tee. Spread the gospel of this flaming douche while wearing the finest of heavyweight cotton. Features Marmalard's catch phrase on the front, name and number 17 on the back.

$ 19.00

SLASHIE /drunk Heavy Tee

Choose your color.

$ 20.00

Ladies FALCO FOREVER/KSK Tank (CC)

It's more expensive because you are. Choose this shirt in color of your choice.

$ 22.50

Door Flies Open Dallas Home Tee

Wearing this shirt is just like having a license to be an asshole wherever you go! Wear proudly the promise of hilarity and poor manners during your frequent sessions of masturbation!

$ 16.50

MARMALARD ALT YELLOW TEE

$ 19.00

HORSE BALLS Cleveland Home Tee

Celebrate the legacy of Horse Balls. Oh, we're talking about that one guy that plays for Cleveland. Not actual equine testicles. Mmm, testicles.

$ 17.00

SLASHIE /wants to kiss you Tee

Choose your color.

$ 15.00

LADIES ELI New York AltTee

Wearing this shirt really takes the edge off of getting an abortion.

$ 18.00

NEW ENGLAND WORLD CHAMPS TEE

Now you Massholes can celebrate early! This highbrow Championship tee is a great way to annoy the rest of us without even uttering a word! Why wait until the end of the postseason, when you can piss wicked weeks in advance!

$ 1,799.00

'99 QB Class Classic

The Classic Starting Five look on a heavyweight cotton shirt.

$ 19.00

'99 QB Class Classic

The Classic Starting Five look on a lightweight cotton shirt.

$ 15.00

Sexy Business Thong

Does it get any sexier? I think not.

$ 16.50

Sexy Business

Are you in the Sexy Business? Well here's your invitation. Ringer t-shirt Note: If you want the shirt but don't like the colors just send an email to UM. Made to order goodness.

$ 22.00

'99 QB Class For the Ladies

KSK honors the greatest quintet of quarterbacks the NFL Draft will ever see with this delightful new take on the Starting 5 concept. Lady's Heavyweight t-shirt. Note: If you want the shirt but don't like the gold/black look just send me an email. That's right, made to order goodness.

$ 18.00

'99 QB Class Sexy Gold on Black

KSK honors the greatest quintet of quarterbacks the NFL Draft will ever see with this delightful new take on the Starting 5 concept. Men's Heavyweight t-shirt. Note: If you want the shirt but don't like the gold/black look just send me an email. Made to order goodness.

$ 18.50

'99 QB Class Team Colors

KSK honors the greatest quintet of quarterbacks the NFL Draft will ever see with this delightful new take on the Starting 5 concept. Men's Lightweight t-shirt. Note: Colors are expensive. I really just made this because I wanted it. I'll leave it up in case any of you want a piece of that.

$ 24.00

¡Viva el Cumslinger!

Heavyweight cotton t-shirt.

$ 19.00

SLASHIE /drunk Tee

Choose your color.

$ 15.00

Sexy Business

Are you in the Sexy Business? Well here's your invitation. Heavyweight cotton Note: If you want the shirt but don't like the colors just send an email to UM. Made to order goodness.

$ 21.00

SEX CANNON Blue Heavy Tee

$ 21.40

SEX CANNON Blue Jersey Tee

$ 24.40

SEX CANNON Orange Lite Tee

$ 21.40

SEX CANNON Orange Heavy Tee

$ 21.40

SEX CANNON Orange Jersey Tee

$ 24.40

SEX CANNON Blue Lite Tee

$ 21.40

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